Any time you disagree with someone, there are three possible ways to resolve it after you’ve both talked about it and had a chance to explain your reasoning.
- I’ll meet you on your side. Picture a straight line with a husband on one side and his wife on the other. Meeting one person on their side means that one of you actually goes all the way to the other side and says, “After I’ve listened to your reasoning, I think I’ll go with your perspective.”
- I’ll meet you in the middle. You come to a compromise. If your spouse thinks six hours of screen time is fine, but you want only two hours, you settle on four hours of screen time.
- I’ll meet you later. This is when it’s pretty obvious that you aren’t going to agree in one sitting. You agree to disagree for the moment, get a good night’s sleep, and pick it up again the following week. You agree to disagree instead of preaching a sermon and ending the evening angry.
Perhaps one of you thinks your daughter is ready for a phone at age 12, but the other parent thinks 15 would be a better age.
Ask your spouse, “Why do you think she’s ready at twelve?”
Really listen and try to understand the other person’s perspective. You might come to a middle ground and decide to evaluate the situation again when your daughter’s 14.
You’re constantly fishing for one of these three solutions, no matter the topic of conflict.