Three Modesty Must Haves For Girls Of All Ages

By Dannah Gresh, Creator of Secret Keeper Girl

When my first book released, it made an unexpected and unprecedented mark in the girl world. (I continue to be amazed that God would take a girl from nowhere Pennsylvania—people honestly cannot remember the name of my hometown—and with no platform and put her on His center stage with a proverbial mic in her hand to talk about purity!) My publisher soon asked if I would write a related book on the topic of modesty. I said “no.” And, I said it fast! I’m a girl who likes to shop ’til she drops. And the prudish, often legalistic ways I had endured modesty teachings as a teen turned me off.

But, I said I would pray about it for a few months. During that time, The Medical Institute for Sexual Health released a study revealing that one of the top five factors that place a teen at risk of an early sexual debut was “appearing older” than they actually are. How does a girl look older, but by the clothes that she wears and the make-up and hairstyles she chooses. This risk moved the topics of modesty, make-up, and age-appropriate fashion to my priority list, as quickly as I declined the offer to write a book on it. My challenge was to discover how to teach modesty without harming a girl’s body image or driving her away from God? I believe we build a better modesty movement through a celebration of beauty and by pursuing respect, rather than obsession over whether a girl wears a one piece or two piece swimsuit. (Please! There are far more modest two-piece tankini suits than the form-fitting one pieces on the racks! Somebody say “Amen!” Dressing modestly when it’s warm is such a battle!) I’m a girl who just won’t compromise on modesty, but I also don’t like to compromise on cute. Here are my top modesty must-haves!



5) A Pack Of Men’s Tank T-Shirts. This is what I like to call my Secret Keeper Girl “Secret Weapon.” Whether you have a taste for crop tops or low riders or low cut shirts, a simple pack of men’s (or boy’s, for your tween girls) tank t-shirts will cure what ails you. Why men’s tank t-shirts? Because they make them nice and long so you can tuck them into your jeans or pants. And, because they’re so much less expensive than the women’s alternative. You can also solve the problem of a low neckline by putting one under a top. I like to actually turn the tank top backwards because sometimes the back is higher.

4.) Lace Extenders for short dresses, tops, or shorts. A little uncertain about how short that dress is? Wish you could just cover your booty a little more? Let me introduce you to the wonderfully modesty,—and statement making—world of lace extenders. My favorite place to purchase them is Grace and Lace, which I discovered when watching Shark Tank. (I love that the company is giving back by building orphanages in India with their proceeds.) You may have found yourself here with the goal of helping your daughter dress appropriately, but you’re just going to love this website for your own shopping pleasure. I really do!


3) Commando Women’s Top Hat Nipple Concealers. Oh, how I wish every female worship leader in the world would discover these. They remove every potential for discomfort—for both the viewer and the user—when the sanctuary grows colder than it ought should be!!! They’re also great for t-shirt days or formal events where you have a smooth, potentially unforgiving top. Just get some. They are not inexpensive, but they’ll last you for years.



I hope these three Modesty Must-Haves make your life more beautiful and more confident. I also hope you might check out Secret Keeper:The Delicate Power of Modesty for teens, which I wrote after all my research on modesty. It remains a best-seller. After 13 years, I’ve finally gotten around to writing an age-appropriate version of it for girls aged 7-12, which released earlier this month entitled Secret Keeper Girl!)

Another way to connect with your child and start the conversation is to attend one of our events for tween boys and girls! Secret Keeper Girl features two fun fashion shows that demonstrate modesty and true beauty, deep Bible teaching, live worship, and stories that help girls aged 7-12 embrace true beauty and modesty. Born to Be Brave features interactive games, Biblical teaching, the WHEEL OF DESTRUCTION, and live worship with the Allan Scott Band— all strategically designed to put the brave back in your boy in a world that will emasculate and rip the goodness out of him, if given the chance.

caroline krise - October 12, 2017

Thank you Dannah for caring about the teen in America. Keep on writing, and may we see more interviews! Love in Christ!

Comments are closed