By Dannah Gresh, Founder of True Girl
More than 6 million children and teens in the U.S. will experience the death of a parent or sibling by age 18—and that doesn’t even count the grief of losing a grandparent, a pet, or even friends.
At True Girl, we often receive requests for tools to help you navigate grief, sadness, or deep disappointment when it touches your girl's life. This past winter, I personally faced a season of grief when I lost my beloved horse, Trigg. Though this experience was relatively minor compared to the profound grief some encounter, the depths of my sadness reminded me of the countless young girls navigating losses ranging from beloved pets to grandparents, siblings, or even parents.
Drawing from my own journey through grief, I felt deeply compelled to create resources that can guide girls into experiencing God's comforting presence during times of loss. As we prepare to release these tools this summer, I want to share three essential truths about grief, followed by three practical tools that can help children cope and find joy.
Three Truths About Grief
1. Grief Is Telling Her the Truth
Losing someone or something hurts. Grief tells us we've lost something precious. It reveals truth about our hearts, our needs, and our love. Scripture itself is full of expressions of grief, such as Psalm 30, showing us that grieving honestly before God is a vital part of spiritual health. Allow your children to express their true feelings without rushing the healing process. It is healthy to pause, remember, grieve, and even cry together.
2. Grief Comes in Many Forms
In the Old Testament, people wore sackcloth to express grief, not only in the event of death but also in anticipation of difficult circumstances, such as Mordecai’s fear of the future. This teaches us that grief isn’t limited to death—it can also arise from situations like moving, failing to make a team, or experiencing change. Every form of grief matters to God, serving as training for our hearts to trust Him more deeply during greater trials.
3. Grief Does End
Psalm 30:11 proclaims, “You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy.” It is God alone who transforms our mourning into joy, an emotion distinctly rooted in His presence. Joy is different from mere happiness—it is a deep, abiding awareness that Jesus is with us, even in pain. Our grief, then, prepares us to sing genuine praises, recognizing that Jesus ultimately overcame all suffering through His death on the cross.
We need to feel grief and expect it's end, but that doesn't make it easy. So here are some tools to help.
Three Recommended Tools for Helping Your Child Cope with Grief
1. Out of the Shadow World by Colleen Chao
Colleen Chao has beautifully crafted a fictional story designed specifically to help children understand and process grief. Written initially for her son to process her own impending death due to cancer, this delightful and insightful book guides young hearts toward healthy grieving practices.
2. My Map to Joy – A new and upcoming True Girl Podcast Season
Join Staci Rudolph and me on my farm as we navigate through my personal grief over losing my horse in our newest True Girl podcast season, launching June 4th. Together, we’ll explore how to honestly process sadness while discovering the joy of Jesus's presence along the way. It's a heartfelt season, complete with an encouraging twist you won’t want to miss.
3. Holy Girl Walk Season 3: Memorizing Psalm 30
Finally, I warmly invite you and your daughter to memorize comforting and informing Scripture about true joy. Psalm 30 is a powerful resource, showcasing how King David dealt with national grief during a devastating epidemic. It teaches us the profound promise: “Weeping may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” Join me starting June 2nd for the Holy Girl Walk Season 3, and let's uncover how grief can lead us closer to the enduring comfort and joy found only in Christ. Just follow me (Dannah Gresh) or True Girl on social media for daily memory prompts. And if you want to take it even deeper, we have a Holy Girl Walk map available in this month's True Girl subscription box.
Get your copy of the Holy Girl Walk Season 3 workbook!
