5 Reasons Why It's Hard To Show Love To Others

By Noli

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By The Pearls,

Do you ever wonder why it's sometimes hard to show love to those who have wronged us?

Human flesh wants to take control and it's our nature to get upset and angry once someone has wronged us. Loving people day in and day out takes strength from God and it consists of a heart change from God. Christians are called to show love to others who may be unloving. We can also show love by helping the poor and serving those in need.

Here are 5 reasons why it is hard to show love to others. 

#1: Fear

“So do not fear for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand”

Isaiah 41:10

As humans, we all want to feel loved and have our needs met in the way we want. Wanting to feel love is a real feeling that everyone feels. When we want to love others in a way that Jesus has loved us, there can be fear that is associated with it. The fear of being rejected, forgotten, and being used can be overwhelming. 

Fear is not from God. We cannot let fear overtake us. Once you overcome the fear (God says we are more than overcomers) and have confidence in The One who created you, you have the opportunity to freely give the love that God has shown you to others. Once daughters see this kind of love in their mothers, they will be more motivated to not be afraid to freely love those around them. 

#2: Sacrifice

“and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God”

Ephesians 5:2 

When it comes to showing love to others it requires sacrifice. Sacrifice is something that took me a while to comprehend. When I was younger, I knew of this couple who had a baby, and once the baby was born the mother passed away. The father loved his child but was not able to take care of her. He decided the loving and sacrificial thing to do was to give the child to someone who was more equipped to take care of her. The father of this child did what he thought would be best for the child even though it was the most difficult decision. This reminded me of God’s love for his people. He loving and sacrificially gave his only son so that we would not have to die for our sins. Sacrifice looks different for a lot of people and in a lot of different ways. I would encourage you to ask yourself what is the most important thing I could lovingly sacrifice for God? 

#3: Misunderstanding True Love from the Father 

“The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness”

Jeremiah 31:3 

If someone has never experienced the true love of God, it can be difficult to love them. People who do not know the true love of God will not understand why Christians love others the way they do. Once Christ is living inside of us, the Holy Spirit is moving and working on our hearts to become more and more like Jesus and to show us how to love His people. It is hard for most girls to comprehend that God loves them unconditionally with a pure and true love. When Jesus died on the cross for us, He showed us how much He loves us. When we show sacrificial love to our daughter and to those around us, it is a great example for them to see the true love of God. 

#4: Feeling Unworthy

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight”

Proverbs 3:5-6 

The thoughts that people have on a daily basis can reflect what they think of themselves and how they look at themselves. When it comes to loving others, it is sometimes difficult to love those who think poorly of themselves. But we need to remind each other that they are loved so deeply by their Heavenly Father and they will never be alone. He is always with them. On the days when your daughter feels unworthy (because those days will come), pick her up, remind her of how beautiful she is, and remind her of Who she belongs to! 

#5: Bitterness 

“But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth”

James 3: 14 

People come from all walks of life and their past can be completely different from the person standing next to them. If someone has had many trials thrown at them, they could have bitterness in their heart. Once the bitterness is there, it can have a hold on one’s life before they find the strength to let it go. Letting go of bitterness allows that person to accept and feel the love of God from others. It gives them a new perspective that can change them forever. You never know what someone may be going through.  If your daughter is holding on to any bitterness, allow her to walk through the healing process with you so that she can go out and love others as Jesus has loved you! 





About the author: Ruth Taatu is one of 49 girls being cared for by The Pearl House. She is 20 years old and is currently in 10th grade.





About The Pearl House: The Pearl House was founded in 2013 to provide hope for girls in rural Ghana, Africa. We have built a place where girls can grow together and there is no fear of poverty or hunger. The Pearl House protects, educates, and disciples at-risk young women in underserved communities around the world. By providing emotional support, physical care, and spiritual development the girls can discover their identity and purpose in Christ. The girls are learning to make a difference in the world and becoming the amazing women they are meant to be.


If you want more resources to teach your daughter the importance of making disciples and salvations check out the True Girl Subscription Plan! This month we are focusing on The Great Commission!

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The True Girl subscription is your toolbox to teach her to love her Bible! Every month your inbox can be filled with a coaching video on important topics and tools to draw your daughter into the Word. And our ultimate option includes a box delivered right to your door! We selected age-appropriate, Christ-centered themes for each box and fill them with ALL-NEW items that build the habits of spiritual disciplines. Here’s what one mom is saying:

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