Hey True Girl Dads!
It's about time we offered some tips for you! We imagine you have just a few questions about your tween daughter, like “Is she really from another planet?” In this blog series, Bob Gresh, author of 8 Great Dates for Dads and Daughters will answer some of the most frequently asked questions we receive from Dads.
Does my relationship with her mother really affect my daughter?
Yes. Yes it does. John Wooden is quoted for saying, “The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” In loving her mother well, you’re not only teaching her about love, loyalty, compassion, respect, commitment, trust and tenderness, you are demonstrating it before her very eyes. You can show her by the way you love and honor your wife that she should never settle for less than that. She will learn from you what qualities to look for and expect in a future husband.
I understand that some of you reading this come from broken relationships. Even if your daughter’s mother is now your ex, there is a godly way to honor her, to speak highly of her, and bless her. Your daughter is watching and she is watching more closely than you think.
If you are currently in a toxic or unhealthy relationship, that is not positively changing or if you’re not receiving counsel, you are essentially telling your daughter that this is ok for her future. If one day your daughter came home and told you she was in a similar relationship being treated the way you (or your wife) is, how would you feel? Would your heart break for her? You’re setting the bar. As the leader of your home, you set the tone and the pace for your wife and your children. I encourage you to genuinely and increasingly love her mother. Treat her with respect and a decent amount of PDA! When your little girl grows up it’s likely she will look for a man who treats her much like the way you treated her mom.
Be the dad that comes home and kisses your wife in front of the kids. They may scream or cover their eyes and say, “Ewwwww” but they will know you love her. Don't let that even be a question in your child's mind! Your daughter will recognize that she wants a husband like you someday.
Strive to love her mother. Love her well. Love her better each day. Your daughter needs to see love demonstrated. Ready, set, go.