How to Stop the Gossip
80 percent of our conversations are spent on discussing other people and their habits. That could be a fancy way of saying “we gossip .
80 percent of our conversations are spent on discussing other people and their habits. That could be a fancy way of saying “we gossip .
By Dannah Gresh, Founder of True Girl
I was speaking at a live event where I challenged the teen girls and their mothers to “confess your sins to each other . . .” so that they could experience healing (James 5:16). At the end of the event, the most innocent little redhead came up to me with a big smile. The baby-white skin on her cheeks was spotted with dainty freckles. She looked to be fourteen or fifteen. As she quickly approached me, her smile melted into uncontrollable tears that contorted her once life-giving smile into a haunted expression.
“I confessed something to my mom,” she blurted. “My sin is reading sexual stories online. I’m addicted and have been for two years.”
Two years! Was she twelve when she began reading erotica?
My mind wrestled with the tragedy of it as I held her and she wept in my arms.
I grieved that night. Lamenting with my friends, my heart entered into an entirely new place in this battle as I realized how young some of the victims can be.
Of course, most adult women who struggle—and plenty do—usually tell me that it started when they were young. Here’s the testimony of a young missionary and Christian leader:
I am single and erotica has ruined my life. I have been addicted for ten years and I am only twenty-five.
No one knows my struggle. No one knows that I have lived an isolated life because I have found more solace in fantasies aroused in my mind by erotica than in real relationships.
Erotica seems harmless because it’s just words on a page but it brands your mind, creates false expectations for future relationships. I can’t even maintain real relationships because I feel like a shallow pretender hiding one of the biggest parts of my life.
Erotica perpetuated my “need” for meeting people online because I didn’t know how to develop or maintain relationships with people outside of the screen. Eventually, I decided to take my online relationships into reality. Many of the stories I read portrayed rape or power-struggle situations as exciting. A “no” didn’t always mean “no” because, in the end, the girl always seemed to end up just fine. So when I met one of my first guys offline, I was thrust ever too quickly into a scenario I had read about but, unlike the stories, I didn’t end up fine. My “no” didn’t mean “no,” and I was sexually abused by a man who did the same things to me that I had read about in those erotic stories. But in my story, there wasn’t a happy ending.
That may sound a bit extreme, but you should understand that it’s not an exaggeration. For years, the purveyors of pornography and erotica have been targeting tweens and teens with the intent of making them into consistent consumers. Graphic sexual content has been woven into mainstream music, television, and movies to such an extent that we’ve become desensitized. What would have been widely considered unacceptable just a few decades ago, can now be found as a part of the regular plot of popular video games and cartoons. The porn and erotica industry is trying to initiate life-long customers with their marketing. To do that, they need to start young.
The $13 billion sex entertainment industry is succeeding in their efforts to convert a generation. Research compiled by Covenant Eyes, reveals the following alarming statistics. 2,3
These statistics are serious, and you, as a parent, have a tough fight ahead of you, but True Girl and Born To Be Brave are here with you in the battle. We want to help you establish a firm victory for your children. The stakes are high and may even elicit a bit of fear. But, as God’s Word reminds us:
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” 2 TIM 1:7
Our webinar will empower you to protect your children from the devastating effects of pornography and erotica. You’ll discover the tactics of those who would do your children harm, and find peace of mind in strategies to outmaneuver them. We’ll help you be prepared, not scared.
Join Bob & Dannah Gresh, Dr. Juli Slattery, Karen Potter, and Rod Stoddard with Covenant Eyes, the pioneer in Internet Screen Accountability. As a parent, you’ll be empowered by learning:
The panel will answer questions from the virtual audience, and a post-event digital Workshop Resource Kit will be made available to all who register for this online event. It includes free resources from the panelists and a list of ten resources that help you talk to your children about porn at any age.
Please join us for a donation of any amount.
(Even if that is $0. But we recommend $20 or more, if you are able to help partner with our ministry to provide more parenting workshops in the future.)
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